TRUE STORY 2019 - don't be fooled by this cute and innocent face!
Rolo here - the smiley lady is a bit cross with me today and I don't know why.
Every day since the beginning of December I have watched her sigh and stare at a cardboard box on the sideboard that has number on it from one to twenty four and opens out flat like a book. She waits until evening, after her dinner then studies the numbers and selects a little trapdoor and opens it and takes out a beautiful handmade chocolate and savours every moment of eating it without sharing with yours truly. Just one. Every day. It's been going on for more than a week.
What makes this a very special box is that it was gifted to her by her meaningful boyfriend and she keeps saying it's the best one she's ever had.
On Monday night the smiley lady went out without me. She was singing in her choir concert and left me with the television on and the stairgate in place and told me to be a good boy.
Whilst she was out, I got up on the sofa (she had moved it to accommodate the Christmas tree) and from the back of it easily climbed on to the sideboard to have a closer look at the beloved box. I was suddenly overwhelmed with the scent of wonderful chocolate and other sweet delights coming from inside the box. I just couldn't help myself.
Very carefully, without knocking down the Lapland gnomes or disturbing anything else on the sideboard, I got the box down onto the floor and knowing my numbers and the importance of sequence, I very carefully opened every single door in order and ate the contents without wrecking the packaging. The smiley lady would be so proud that I know my numbers from 9 right up to 24. You wouldn't even know I'd opened it, except I left the box on the floor. There were no tell tale signs of destruction - I'd simply opened the doors as I'd seen her do. Feeling full and sleepy I slept in my basket until I heard her key in the door.
Coming into the lounge she saw at once what I had done and instead of praising me for knowing my numbers and not destroying the box she berated me for eating all her very expensive chocolates.
Smiley lady, I was only thinking of you and your waistline, knowing you would worry about the calories... I must say they were very nice indeed - I didn't have a hurty tummy at all, nor was I sick or worse! For some reason she keeps dragging me out on long walks and is also threatening to replace the Jack Russell on the top of the Christmas tree with me!
Cautionary tale; Dogs are not supposed to eat chocolate. Jack Russells are robust and unlike other dogs. Do not try this at home furry friends or you might end up at the dogtor or worse. I was lucky to get away with it. The smiley lady is still cross. I am as right as rain and looking forward to Santa Paws coming this year!